Home
 
Choose Your City
Change City

Making resolutions for others

Making New Year’s resolutions is a lot of fun. Keeping them, on the other hand, is a drag.

Making New Year’s resolutions is a lot of fun.

Keeping them, on the other hand, is a drag.

This year, I’ve decided to maximize the fun and minimize the drag by making New Year’s resolutions for other people. That way, someone else has to keep them ... or not. If they’re anything like me, they’ll try halfheartedly for a couple of days and then return to their bad old habits.

And so…
For Mayor Gregor Robertson I resolve that he should live up to his promise to run a transparent City Hall.

That was one of the promises that swept him to victory, but when the paint was still fresh on the door at 12th and Cambie, he surprised everyone by turfing city manager Judy Rogers and installing his own person, Penny Ballem, without a lick of public consultation. I personally don’t think you need to consult the public to pick a city manager, but it’s not my resolution. If you’re going to promise transparency, be transparent. Or promise something else, like plowing the streets after a snowstorm.

For Premier Gordon Campbell I resolve that he remembers not to drink and drive over the holidays, wherever he travels. Then he should resolve not to get overconfident about winning the next election, which is — horrors — creeping up on us, although implementing a carbon tax on the eve of a recession seems like an indication of overconfidence to me.

For NDP Leader Carole James I resolve that she should reconsider her directive to run only female candidates in ridings where NDP MLAs aren’t running again. When we go to the polls on May 15, we would like to vote for the best candidate available, not just the best female candidate. I realize that for centuries, we only got to vote for the so-called best man, but here in the 21st century it’s a good idea to swear off all prejudice, even that disguised as affirmative action.

For John Furlong and VANOC I resolve that they should do a better job on their finances in 2009. It’s more than a little disturbing that these guys have underestimated their costs by about $170 million according to the province’s auditor general. In the meantime, big sponsors such as General Motors are skating on thin ice, which, rumour has it, will be an IOC-recognized sport for the 2010 games.

For Mats Sundin¸ I resolve that he should score at least 30 goals and take the Canucks to the Stanley Cup. That may seem like a lot for a guy who hasn’t played hockey for nine months, but as he’s being paid $5.625 million for the rest of the season, that comes to $187,500 a goal, which should make this resolution easy to keep. Unless it’s not about the money. Right.
Happy New Year.

 
 
Consider AlsoFurther Articles