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APPRENTICE: FALLEN WOMEN EDITION: Donald Trump has begun the charm offensive to attract more prominent celebrities to his celebrity version of The Apprentice, according to a story in the New York Post gossip section. Already confirmed to appear on the show are financial guru Jim Cramer, Carmen Electra, Joan Rivers, Naomi Judd, George Foreman, ex-model Kimora Lee Simmons, disgraced baseball legend Pete Rose, race car drivers Dana Patrick and Jeff Gordon, skateboard mogul Tony Hawk and first season Apprentice villain Omarosa.
Obviously this list of a- and b-list names aren’t enough to get Trump the publicity he needs for the show, so the self-proclaimed human brand has launched a campaign to get the trifecta of walking celebrity train wrecks on the show – Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan. Of the three, only Hilton – who’d probably accompany Michael Vick to a dog fight if they paid her and fulfilled her rider – has expressed interest in appearing.
“We're negotiating with Britney right now. Can you imagine her doing it?" Trump told the Post, and proceeded to exhibit the suavity that’s made him a legend in three solar systems. "We're not sure what will happen. She's a f---ing mess. And that little reality show she had did nothing. But she likes the idea of being on television and I think she'd be great.”
Hey – throw in childcare and you’ve probably got her, Donald, though Lohan might be a bigger fish to catch, non-stop career suicide notwithstanding. Discussing Lohan, Trump exhibited his trademark empathy: “Another f---ing mess. We haven't asked her yet, but I'm going to call her this week. It would a positive thing for her to do … for all of them.”
EAT YOUR VEGETABLES: Celebrity chef Jamie Oliver is apparently working with Aardman Studios, the people behind Wallace & Gromit and Chicken Run, to produce a children’s cartoon show featuring a 10-year-old version of Oliver as he strives to become a great chef. Oliver will provide the voice of Little J, the title character, for the 52-episode series which is aimed at 7 to 11-year-olds, and features, according to a story in the U.K. Guardian, “bizarre characters including a depressed ham, a mad scientist called Eggs Benedict and a band called the Vulgar Vegetables.”
In related animation news, Sesame Street has finished a claymation series called The Adventures Of Bert And Ernie, according to Broadcasting & Cable magazine. Starring the two keystone Sesame Street characters, it’s the first wholesale departure from puppetry in the history of Sesame Street.
And if you’re wondering why I’m reporting on this stuff, I should point out that, with two pre-schoolers at home, I probably watch more Disney movies and Treehouse shows than any edgy, “quality” cable shows on HBO or Showtime, so count yourself lucky that I don’t write more about Curious George, Max & Ruby or Charlie And Lola.