Should women feel any type of guilt when they voluntarily become pregnant?
In my opinion, absolutely not! That’s an absurd and ridiculous notion. Women, as a gender, have the natural ability to reproduce. It’s one of the things that only we can do, and without it, the world wouldn’t re-populate (notwithstanding cloning as a rare option).
However, in the workplace, many women do feel guilty. For some, it’s self-imposed. They feel sick about “letting their company down.” They feel that the company won’t function as well without them, and they hold themselves accountable.
Unfortunately, women are the harshest judges of other women, and those I spoke to all agreed that if a woman returns to work after her legitimate maternity leave, and she’s already pregnant, it’s unacceptable. But these women wish they didn’t feel that way. They know it’s part of life’s cycle that many women tend to have other children not long after the first. And they know that they, too, could find themselves in the same situation.
In other instances, it’s the woman’s co-workers, or even her boss, who make disparaging and critical comments.
One woman told me that when she informed her boss she was pregnant and would be leaving, he snorted, “Oh great! Are you trying to ruin my holiday schedule?”
Another woman said that once her colleague found out she’d be going on mat leave in six months, he started coming into her office unannounced, measuring the walls, and taping up paint chips!
Many companies talk the talk about equal opportunity, maternity leave and benefits, all encouraging to having babies. But when those women get pregnant, often male staff, especially those in higher positions, give the women grief. That’s neither fair nor their right.
Companies would do better to support women in having babies because it’s not only normal and natural, it creates loyalty, which makes for a long-term relationship.
And, if these companies’ policies really abided by not only the legal requirements, as stated in the Employment Standards Act (specific to each province), of good maternity leave and benefits, but also a supportive attitude, then they would be nurturing a secure and welcoming workplace.
As a result, their female employees would look forward to returning to work, and many would be that much more productive.
Women and men have different skill sets and companies would be better off employing both sexes in every area, to get their different expertise. Yes, it can be challenging for a business to hire a woman, train her, then lose her to her family.
Obviously, mat leave replacements are needed, and further training may be involved.
But many companies have wisely adapted, through systems of job sharing and flexible hours. In other words, like the women they employ, they understand that’s life.
