1. “When I get that feeling, I want sexual healing, sexual healing, oh baby.” What is this song’s next line?
A “Hit me one more time.”
B “Makes me feel so fine”
C “I’m aged like a fine wine.”
D “Does anyone want a slice of lime?”
2. Is the clitoris generally always in the same place, or does it differ woman to woman?
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A It’s always in the same place: above the opening of the urethra and vagina
B It’s always in the same place: perpendicular to the labia majora
C It differs woman to woman
D What is this “clitoris” you speak of?
3. Of the six possible romantic entanglements for a female version of Commander Shepard in Mass Effect II — 2010’s Video Game of the Year — how many are human?
4. When do women have the most eggs?
A When they hit puberty
B In their early 20s
C When they hit their sexual peak, around 34
D When they’re a baby in the womb
5. What percentage of the world’s men are circumcised?
6. According to the YouTube video “How to Kiss with Passion” — which has received 32.6 million views — what is the first step?
A Brush your teeth, floss and use mouthwash; at the very least, have a mint.
B Sit with your partner in private.
C Relax and clear your mind.
D Angle your face to avoid crunching noses.
7. One in 10 women have what in common?
A They will never have an orgasm.
B They have uneven breasts.
C They have multiple orgasms every time.
D They admit to smoking after sex.
8. What does BBW stand for?
A Big, Bald and Wonderful
B Bigger, Better, Wetter
C Big Bow Wow
D Big Beautiful Woman
9. Which of these actresses has not played a prostitute onscreen?
A Jodie Foster
B Monica Belluci
C Jennifer Aniston
D Barbra Streisand
10. The most viewed video of all time on YouPorn, with more than 48 million views, is …
A “Great Body, Great Sex, Great”
B “Paris Hilton — Movie”
C “Fantasy Girl C**s to Life”
D “Blonde hottie p***y and a**”
scroll down for the answers
Correct answers: 1B, 2A, 3: C, (if you got question 3 correct, you lose a point), 4D, 5B, 6A, 7A, 8D, 9C, 10A
How to score
If you answered 8-10 correct: Frankly, we’re surprised you stopped having sex long enough to read this pervy quiz.
If you answered 4-7 correct: You, like most sexual encounters, were neither amazing nor embarrassing — mostly forgettable. Let’s never speak of this again.
If you answered 0-3 correct: We loved you in that movie, what was it called? With the funny guy? Oh, right, “The 40 Year Old Virgin.”