He’s caring, a great listener, has an outfit for every occasion (even holographic cummerbunds!) and would be the perfect man — if only he weren’t plastic.
We’re talking about Ken, of course, and in the new book I Love Ken: My Life as the Ultimate Boyfriend, he finally shares his secrets on how to be the world’s best boy toy (he should know — he’s been one for 50 years). Luckily, we were able to get him — with help from author Jef Beck — to share his tips on how to get the doll of your dreams:
Shower her with compliments
I know my doll always dresses like she’s ready to strut down a runway, so why does she need me to tell her she looks good? Seriously, she needs to hear it, and she needs to hear it often. Compliment her hair, her shoes — even her handbag.
Clean up your man-cave
Dude, you have to get your bachelor pad in order. Give her the impression that you don’t need a doll to take care of you (even if you do). Transform your man-cave into a love lounge.
Make a grand gesture
You have to pony up some hard-earned play money to impress your doll. When it comes to my doll, I know I have to think outside the toy box. I’m not saying light up Times Square, but you get the idea.
Dress for success
As you know, my doll is into fashion — shocker! I can’t show up to a premiere or fashion show looking like I’m ready for a pick-up game at the gym. Man up, guys, it’s time to check it or chuck it. If it has holes, is from another decade or she just plain hates it, chuck it. You don’t want your doll to cringe when your mug shows up on Facebook.