“Overwhelmed by debt? Go on a debt diet”

abcnews.go.com, Nov. 1
This is a great idea! Unless, of course, you number
hunger among your weaknesses.

“Massive crater swallows car in Germany”

news.com.au, Nov. 2
Authorities name Octomom as a person of interest.

“Ark. board member who posted anti-gay rant to quit”
Associated Press, Oct. 29
Never would have happened if Noah were still running
the show.
He rubber-stamped the platypus, for God’s sake!

“Money woes can be early clue to Alzheimer’s”
nytimes.com, Oct. 30
America should really get itself tested ...

“Car crash caused by coyote”
beatcalls.com, Oct. 30
Condolences to the Runner family, but we’re relieved at
Wile E.’s long-sought success.

“Polk Sheriff’s chaplain during prostitution sting”

wtsp.com, Oct. 29
We think you should be able to poke whomever you want,
but this smacks of bad timing.

“Report of odor diverts NY-Cuba flight to Baltimore”

myfoxdc.com, Nov. 1
Looks like they found it.

“4-year-old can be sued, judge rules”

nytimes.com, Oct. 28
Get ready for a world of pain, Billy. All your base are
belong to us.

“What happened to please and thank you?”

today.msnbc.msn.com, Nov. 4
What happened to I’ll let you out of the basement
when I’m good and ready?