It’s Oscar weekend, Canada. If you’re one of the dozens of friends I’ve invited over for Sunday’s show, I sure hope you love processed cheese.
Entire books and documentary films have been made on the subject of Oscar’s Best Moments. But if you’ve ever watched the broadcast, you’ll know the old saying applies: Oscar has some great moments and some murderous half hours. And I’m finding it harder to find those moments.
I keep tuning in to the Academy Awards expecting to be transported to Planet Glamour. But it’s never emotionally satisfying.
Why is it that in Hollywood they can make Inception in IMAX, but they can’t craft a short speech? Why did they give Mel Gibson an Oscar for Braveheart? And why doesn’t everyone look like Tilda Swinton?
Wouldn’t it be great if this year’s Oscar for Best Picture went to the zombie flick? I’m talking about Black Swan. How would you describe Natalie Portman’s character other than zombie-like?
She’s brutal, single-minded, she mutilates bodies, she morphs onscreen from a human being to a grotesque monster. She even feasts on human blood when she bites the tongue of Vincent Cassell.
Anyway, here’s a fun game to play while making your Oscar nachos. Just name a country that is currently having, or about to have, a democratic uprising. It goes like this: Egypt. Libya. Bahrain. Ummmm. Algeria? Tunisia! Oh, geez... Pass.
Pass? What about Iran, Zimbabwe, Mauritania, Saudi Arabia? What about China?
Remember last winter when there was a global fear of the H1N1 pandemic? This year the virus is freedom.
It’s moving so quickly everyone’s trying to blame it on computers. Tunisia and Egypt were both said to have been sparked by Facebook or Twitter. But it’s not true.
In fact there’s a handbook for revolutionary non-violent action. It wouldn’t work in Hollywood because non-violent is a non-starter. But it seems to be doing big box office everywhere else.
Want to meet the man who wrote it? I did.
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