Here are a few questions to ask yourself about the person you’re dating before offering them a permanent position:

Are you the center of their universe?
It might feel nice to be worshipped for a while, especially if you’ve been dumped recently, but that'll get old fast. A partner with their own life is more likely to respect yours.

How do they treat waitstaff?
Are they polite and patient, even if a brand new employee accidentally nudges their elbow when clearing?

Do they say please and thank you?
If the answers to the above are “yes,” then they’re a keeper.


Do they call their mom more than they call you?
There’s nothing wrong with familial love; in fact, a close relationship with the ’rents is a sign of stability (look ma, no baggage!). However, unless their mom is in the hospital or recently widowed, a grown woman or man shouldn’t need to check in every day with “Mommy.”

Do they constantly bitch about their co-workers?
If so, all that criticizing might just be a cover for being hopeless at their job, as well as an excuse for not getting off their ass and improving their situation.

Do they turn their cell phone off during a date?
If they answer their phone while you’re sitting at the dinner table? That’s grounds for walking right out. (Texting counts, too.)

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