Ellis Henican

Columnist

Trump's America: Trump’s short send-off for dearly-departed McCain

What do you say when someone dies you never really liked? Very few Americans are wrestling with that quandary today when it comes to John McCain. John McCain was one of the very most beloved people anywhere in public life. Republicans, Democrats, people who loathe everyone in politics —...

Sunday, August 26, 2018, 9:10 PM

Trump's America: Trump expects nothing from Putin, will likely get it

Why set the bar high? You’ll only fall short and leave people disappointed. Donald Trump made his share of missteps on his way into today’s one-on-one with Vladimir Putin in Helsinki, the one-on-one part being only one of them. But the usually boastful American president certainly made...

Sunday, July 15, 2018, 6:12 PM

Trump's America: Trapped in a cave, trapped in a jail

Q: What’s the difference between innocent children trapped in a cave in Thailand and innocent children trapped in an immigrant jail in the United States? A: In Thailand, rescuers are hurrying to free the innocents. In America, the government is doing everything it can to extend...

Sunday, July 8, 2018, 8:39 PM

Trump's America: With Putin rootin’ for the home team, the fix-ski is in

Steal an American election, steal a World Cup match — is it all in a day’s work for the Russian strongman Donald Trump praises so often and so lavishly? Football fans around the world certainly have fresh cause to be suspicious of Vladimir Putin. Do we have to add “unofficial...

Sunday, July 1, 2018, 7:17 PM

Trump's America: Table for None. Take Your Stinkin’ Politics Someplace Else!

Your table isn’t waiting. You and your kind aren’t welcome here. You don’t have to love Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Donald Trump’s truth-be-damned press secretary, to recognize the woman has a right to dine in whatever awful restaurant she chooses, so long as she has shoes on...

Sunday, June 24, 2018, 8:24 PM

Trump's America: Like sleepaway camp, only you don’t know where your parents are

What a fine way to celebrate Father’s Day! Rip a few hundred immigrant families apart! The heat is rising on the Trump administration’s policy of separating parents from their children at the border, and not just because of the large, canvas tents in the 100-degree South Texas sun....

Sunday, June 17, 2018, 8:35 PM

Trump's America: To Be Diplomatic About It, That Stunk!

Too bad international diplomacy isn’t as simple as signing a presidential pardon. If that were true, Donald Trump could be hailed in Singapore today as the 21st century’s Dag Hammarskjöld. The Art of the Dealmight even be taken off the fiction shelf. In signing pardons, Trump has...

Sunday, June 10, 2018, 8:15 PM

I Beg My Pardon, Mr. Mueller

Pardon me! What used to be a perfectly polite expression could soon be a full-blown constitutional crisis, thanks to the potential prosecution known officially as the United States of America vs. Donald John Trump. That became painfully plain over the weekend. In a confidential, 20-page letter...

Sunday, June 3, 2018, 9:59 PM

Trump's America: Just Shut Up and Salute!

You don’t high-five the latest school shooting, and you don’t go around wishing people happy Memorial Day. Doesn’t everyone know that by now? Um, not everyone. There was Donald Trump, tweeting bright and early, as the rest of the nation was commemorating the ongoing tragedy of...

Monday, May 28, 2018, 6:44 PM

Trump’s America: Shutting the door on gun sanity

Another ten dead by gunfire, and here we go again. This time, the slaughter was outside Houston at Santa Fe High School. And Dan Patrick, the pro-gun lieutenant governor of Texas, had another imbecilic excuse for refusing to do anything about America’s sickness with guns. Guns weren’t...

Sunday, May 20, 2018, 6:05 PM

Trump’s America: So funny America forgot to laugh

Wanna hear a joke about an American hero dying of brain cancer? I didn’t think so. No decent person would. And it would take an even bigger creep to tell a joke like that and, once confronted by the dying man’s distraught family, to refuse to utter a public apology. Welcome to...

Sunday, May 13, 2018, 7:09 PM

Trump’s America: Rudy cleans up the cleanup

Why hide? Whatever else might be said of Rudy Giuliani, the former New York mayor does not suffer from excessive timidity. And there he was again on Sunday, sitting in the glare of television lights, publicly counterpunching on behalf of his latest client, the president of the United States....

Sunday, May 6, 2018, 3:25 PM

Trump’s America: WWPD? Fire the House chaplain for a prayer

Holy Mary, Mother of God! What on Earth is Paul Ryan trying to prove? That a Catholic priest can’t minister to people with families? That God-fearing politicians shouldn’t look out for the poor? The outgoing Speaker sure has raised some dicey questions by abruptly dismissing the...

Sunday, April 29, 2018, 6:50 PM

Trump’s America: Let the spouses speak, I say

I have a wife. She has opinions. And sometimes — this part may surprise you — her opinions differ from mine. This can be frustrating for someone like me who enjoys being right all the time. But really, what am I supposed to do? I much prefer the company of people who possess their own...

Sunday, April 22, 2018, 6:12 PM

Trump’s America: Mission creep in the White House

To declare “Mission Accomplished,” don’t you need to know what the mission is? That key step is still noticeably AWOL from Donald Trump’s victory dance on Syria. We’re pulling our troops out … maybe. We’re “establishing a strong deterrent against...

Sunday, April 15, 2018, 5:12 PM

Trump’s America: Prepping the prez for Mueller’s perjury trap

Metro columnist Ellis Henican imagines a possible conversation between President Donald Trump and his attorney Ty Cobb as the two prepare for the president to face an interrogation from special counsel Robert Mueller. Attorney Ty Cobb: Special counsels don’t invite people over just...

Sunday, April 8, 2018, 4:39 PM

Trump’s America: Happy Easter, you losers!

Christ has died, Christ has risen — Donald Trump is going to insult again. What? You thought that Easter, the holiest day of the Christian calendar, might soften the heart of America’s insult-spewing president? Then, you probably also believe in the Easter Bunny! Anyone hoping for a...

Sunday, April 1, 2018, 6:26 PM

Trump’s America: Please, don’t let Trump be Trump!

Suddenly, the most volatile president in American history is spinning even more wildly out of control, hell-bent on ripping the handcuffs off and turning up the Trumpitude to 11. And you probably thought he was at full blast already. Just wait. Just wait. We’ve arrived at a deeply...

Sunday, March 25, 2018, 5:48 PM

Trump’s America: Look who’s next on the White House firing line

Ready, aim…fire Robert Mueller! Isn’t that where Donald Trump is heading next? He’s sending out some dire signals, that’s for sure. In a barrage of increasingly furious weekend tweets, the angry president complained with fresh bitterness about the terrible unfairness of...

Sunday, March 18, 2018, 7:27 PM

Trump’s America: Uncaged and unhinged! It’s re-election time!

Campaign Donald is uncaged again. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking: When was he ever caged? Well, compared to the wild man who turned up over the weekend in Moon Township, Pennsylvania — yes, that’s really the name — the character who’s been seething...

Sunday, March 11, 2018, 6:27 PM