What a week it has already been for the NFL’s three biggest media darlings/media whores.
A look at who is making the headlines and why:
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The Danity Kane darling: Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson
Oh how Chad wishes it was still 2006.
Absolutely no one tries harder than Ochocinco but to be fair to the free agent receiver (guessing this will be his official title for the next eight-to-10 years or so), more times than not his social media antics are amusing. The problem is that even ESPN doesn’t take him seriously anymore so we now rarely hear of his escapades.
Ochocinco's latest act is worth it as he “adopted” a homeless man named “Porkchop.”
The ex-Bengal/ Patriot/Dolphin bought Porkchop new clothes and even took the Miami non-resident clubbing.
“Spent my whole day with Robert ‘PorkChop’ he doesn’t know his last name, at Urban Outfitters, taking him to club Dream for an hour or so,” Ochocinco Tweeted regarding his new best bud. “Gave dude a G-shock watch I had in the car so he can tell time, we’re listening to Frankie Beverly n Maze on my iPhone living it up.”
No, I will not go the late night talk show host route and say that Porkchop was actually the one taking in this homeless man named Ochocinco. I refuse to do that.
The Rick Warren darling: Tim Tebow
It’s hard to believe that it’s been well over a year that “Tebow-mania” was running wild. Yeah, ESPN goes over the top with Tebow coverage but, even on paper, the Tebow story is still amazing just because of this alone: In his last postseason as an NFL starting quarterback he threw a game-winning touchdown pass to win an actual NFL playoff game.
In normal circumstances, do you realize how appetizing that sentence is to most NFL GMs? The guy has won an actual NFL playoff game. And 15 months later, no one in football is interested?
Well, that’s not entirely true. The lingerie football league is offering Tebow a coaching job. LFL President Mitchell Mortaza wrote, “Now that it appears Mr. Tim Tebow’s career in the National Football League may be coming to an end, we at Legends Football League would like to extend him an offer to become our Quarterbacks Coach nationally.”
Not really sure how being the QB coach of every single LFL team would work. Is it like an automatic quarterback in backyard football type of deal?
Anyway, there’s no chance in Hades that Tebow accepts this offer as these type of things pop up nearly every week now (see Gronkowski, Rob doing porn). Still, here’s hoping we’ll see the “ridiculous, money grab offer to popular athlete” barrier broken down Jason Collins-style over the next year or so.
The Mike Tyson’s Punchout ‘Great Tiger’ Darling: Manti Te’o
Just about every Manti Te’o disappearing act joke has been made right down to the 1980s video game reference above. That didn’t stop the San Diego Union Tribune from publishing this cartoon (Click Here) this week after the Chargers drafted the former Notre Dame standout.
Follow Metro Boston sports editor and columnist Matt Burke on Twitter @BurkeMetroBOS