Welcome to the Election Day version of Playing the Field, aka 400-plus words of awkward attempts to tie sports gossip stories to politics.
The best part about Nov. 7, 2012, of course, will be that we no longer see the 30 second spots of "he said, she said" campaign commercials that flood the airwaves every night and, sadly, every Sunday of the NFL season. We also will be done with all those ridiculous photo-ops for awhile.
For instance, how much beer has Barack Obama swilled during this campaign? He certainly took advantage of the fact that Mitt Romney is downright frightened of the common man's beverage, posing with full glasses of Yuengling (gotta win Pennsylvania) and even becoming the first President to brew his own beer in the White House. You've got to imagine that Obama would have gone full-fledged "Stone Cold" Steve Austin on the campaign trail if his advisers had said it would win him just two or three more undecideds.
Coincidentally, fans from Obama's hometown of Chicago like beer too. It was reported this week that Chicago Bears fans drank the city of Nashville dry this past weekend ... literally ... as the Bears put a whoopin' on the Titans. According to NBCChicago, The Paradise Park Trailer Resort had completely run out of beer by early Sunday night and the Whiskey Bent Saloon had just two brands left (guessing Molson Ice and Keystone Lite). Bears players themselves were amazed at the amount of Chicago fans who showed up all weekend in the Music City.
Said quarterback Jay Cutler, a Romney supporter who is no stranger to the frosty stuff himself:
"They've travelled well. Hats off to our fans, it's been a fun year -- Dallas, Jacksonville, here it's been crazy to watch the Bears fans take over. You know you have a ton of fans when you're in an away stadium in the red zone and I'm trying to get the crowd to hush up and they're responding. They got quiet in a hurry, so it makes it fun."
Ladies and gents, the Jeb Bush of the NFL - Marcus Vick!!!
As Mike Vick and the Eagles continued to plummet Monday night in New Orleans, brother Marcus thought it would be a good idea to take on the entire city of Philadelphia on his Twitter account. This always works out well!!!
The best of @MVFive during the Saints-Eagles game:
"Please trade my brother. We requesting out of Philly!!!! Please please please......"
"F***ing line shitty!!! I never seen a Qb get pressured so fast....."
"This not even an NFL type of O-line. What happen to the hogs the Eagles had last year and year before? Call Winston Justice back n Jamal J"
"Finally a long run. Damn!! That's the best hole the line opened up all year..... Wtf"
"Super bad decision!!!! Mistake after mistake after mistake!! @MVFive changing the channel"
"I don't want to see brother with brain problems by the time he 45. Everybody have a job to do so do it. They all professionals"
"Besides the O-line the Eagles team way to talented to be playing like the way they been playing. So what's the problem? #letmekno"
"What happen from 2010 till now. How u sign better players but record get worst?#helpmeunderstand"
"Look at the holes in that Defense. Damn I can rush for a buck behind that line lmao......"
"Only reason I said trade was bc I hear all that Nick Foles talk. Honestly who is he? What was his college record at Arizona? #letmeknow"
"Get Mitt Romney off my TV. He the last person I want to hear talk right now"