Well, folks, we’re inching our way back to the night that started it all — in tonight’s episode, Daniel and fake-Emily get engaged! But first, let’s backtrack.
At the top of the hour, Daniel’s all ready to propose, which isn’t music to Victoria’s ears. Daniel’s reply: some variation on “If you really loved me, you’d want me to be happy.” Victoria? Happy? Not likely. Have we ever even seen her happy this whole year?
Fake-Emily tells real-Emily to lie low for a bit because Victoria Grayson burned down Mason Treadwell’s house (not true) and she might find a way to blame it on Amanda (neé Emily).
Conrad decides to help Declan out by sending him to Charlotte’s boarding school so they can be together. He foots the bill for the pricey tuition, claiming that Declan’s made life easier for Charlotte and he wants to return the favor. Holy cow, he’s still got no idea Charlotte’s not his kid!
Ah, but he’s about to find out. Someone slips Conrad the video interview of David Clarke admitting he had a daughter with Victoria, named Charlotte (after Clarke’s favorite aunt). Victoria had casually failed to mention this to her lawyer, and Conrad spills the secret at their divorce proceedings. The lawyers set up a paternity test. Victoria wants to know how this all came about — she suspects “Amanda Clarke” (real-Em) has something to do with it, so she has Ashley invite her over for tea. At tea, Victoria offers her strawberries and crème fraiche (very Hamptons), although Victoria’s onto something when she’s all like “Huh. I see you’re not deathly allergic to strawberries anymore like you were as a kid.” Victoria puts real-Em on the spot, saying she knows Treadwell’s interview tapes of David Clarke weren’t destroyed in his house fire. Real-Em fights fire with fire and doesn’t budge — she even sassily leaves by telling Mrs. G., “I don’t take orders from you!”
Let’s see, also before the big engagement: Conrad wants a public trial, which would humiliate Victoria since everyone would find out she has a child with presumed mass murderer David Clarke. Naturally Victoria’s against the idea. Also, Nolan overhears real-Em telling Jack about her tea date with Mrs. Grayson, and warns her to keep him out of the loop.
OK, so onto the big proposal! Daniel sets up a fancy dinner on a boat with a private string quartet and everything. All of a sudden it starts to pour, as it does during most TV/movie engagements, and there he goes, schpeeling about how he wants to be with her forever. He presents her with a huge, probably custom-made rock (I’m guessing he didn’t go to Jared) and she hesitates a bit but does end up saying yes. Ah, but poor girl, you could see the torment in her eyes. How far will her revenge plot take her?
So back to the Graysons. Victoria’s lawyer gets mad that he didn’t know about the affair, and Victoria doesn't like dealing with people who get mad at her, so she fires him. She also hires some random guy to go to the Stowaway and hunt down the videos that her idea of Amanda Clarke (but it WAS the REAL Amanda!) stole from Treadwell’s. The guy hits on real-Em and then beats up Jack. Fake-Em finds out and is sad, because she's super in love with him.
Now, dear viewers, we’re treated to an amazing twist! We learn that Victoria’s lawyer was really on Team fake-Emily this whole time! Yes, fake-Em and the lawyer dude have a little pow-wow under the boardwalk, with him apologizing for the beating of Jack, saying he wasn’t involved and that Victoria hired someone else to do it. He also tells her that he switched the DNA sample on the crème fraiche spoon so that Victoria wouldn’t find out that that wasn't the real Amanda Clarke in her house earlier.
Another juicy part of tonight’s episode (and it served as a nice intro to anyone new to the show): Fake-Em explained the whole revenge plot to real-Em, telling her how the Graysons framed her father and that as Amanda Clarke, she isn’t safe in the Hamptons anymore because everyone's onto her. Real-Em gets the hell out, leaving some sort of “all good things must come to an end” note for Jack, which of course doesn’t sit too well with him.
Daniel has a heart-to-heart with his old man, who vaguely tells him his mother is keeping a big secret from him. When Daniel confronts her on it, she admits that Conrad isn’t really Charlotte’s father and that David Clarke is. But, menacing bitch that she is, we later learn that she ALSO tells Daniel that David Clarke RAPED HER and that Charlotte was a result of that.
Also having a heart-to-heart tonight: Nolan and fake-Emily. She’s questioning how far she wants to take this whole thing — should she marry Daniel in an effort to ruin his family? She’s tells Nolan she’s going to take a breather on the whole getting even thing and return the ring. But does she give back that sparkler? Of course not! Why, that wouldn’t link up with where “Revenge” all started. We have an engagement party to get to, people!