Rockies 7, Phillies 1
Up next: vs. Texas Rangers, Friday, 7:05 p.m. (PHL 17)

What went wrong ...

1 The Great Giambino

Jason Giambi went deep three times and drove in all seven of the Rockies’ runs. The Great Giambino, who entered the game with a Phillie-esque .115 batting average, has never had such a night. Not even during his steroid days. “Hey, someone should check his blood,” a bitter fan yelped after his third bomb.

2 Paging Big Joe

What we didn’t see was Joe Blanton, who was scratched before the game due to elbow soreness. Kyle Kendrick was rocked for two Giambi blasts. The emergency starter gave up five runs and seven hits in three innings. Danys Baez didn’t fair much better, giving up the third Giambi blast. If Big Joe started, he would have handled the Giambino, right?

3 Batter up

The offense was MIA again. Things are so bad that Cliff Lee pinch-hit in the third. What was atypical? A Phillies batter, Lee, got a standing ovation. What was typical? A Phillies batter, Lee, struck out. Ryan Howard and Co. managed just six hits. The Phillies were about to tie a franchise mark for offensive futility by going six straight games without getting at least six hits — until Ross Gload singled in the ninth.