With the recent public outcry (fine, there’s like four of us) regarding the poor decision by CBS/Turner Sports to use the slowed-down orchestra version of their NCAA theme throughout the majority of this year’s tournament we thought we’d give you, the public, a little taste of what you’re missing (a whole hell of a lot).

I realize that the suits at CBS and Turner want to show that there’s a difference between the NCAA on CBS and “March Madness” across the CBS, TBS, TNT and truTV airwaves. They’re working on a brand, I get it.

But honestly, why upset the only people that care about such things (NCAA diehards and losers like me) with a mindless tweak (which debuted last year)?

We thought the NCAA and CBS learned its lesson when it carted out Jennifer Hudson to sing “One Shining Moment” (she goes over top, sure, but it’s not as bad as people made it out to be). In truth, Luther Vandross is not that much better than Hudson.

Here’s the deal: that the majority of sports fans take tradition, even the lamest of traditions like ‘One Shining Moment,’ VERY seriously. In turn, TV execs typically fear any sort of backlash, so it’s always curious that these guys constantly feel the need to tweak.

Without further delay, here are the TV sports themes that should ALWAYS be there for us, regardless of network affiliation (the leagues should just buy the rights to the song), regardless of time period.

NBA on NBC

The Mona Lisa of sports themes. And there is no second place.

Every Sunday in the ’90s, this song single-handedly got us through a horrid era of basketball. The saddest part is, ESPN reportedly had a chance to bring it back when it won the contractual rights to broadcast the NBA back in 2003.

Regardless, we’re forever in debt to you, Mr. John Tesh.

MLB on CBS

The right amount of nostalgia mixed with the right amount of prestige. It just screams baseball.

The Masters theme

What, you DON’T want to share a warm cup of milk with Jimmy Nantz by a fake fire? Do you have no soul? This should be used for every golf major … no, it wouldn’t get old.

NFL on CBS

The toughest choice because we’ve truly been spoiled over the years with all the great football themes the networks have conjured up. But I’ll go with the current CBS theme here.

It’s funny, fans of AFC teams will always take the CBS theme, or previously the NBC theme, over the FOX theme.

Fans of NFC teams don’t believe a theme other than the NFL on FOX should exist.

NHL on ESPN

NHL labor issues and Disney’s pursuit of the NBA put an end to this glorious theme. Couldn’t NBC trade it’s NBA theme to ESPN/ABC in exchange for this gem?