Sit down, America. I think we should talk. Are you comfortable?
I don't want you to think I'm trying to run your life. We've been family for a long time now, and we'll still be family afterward no matter what you decide. But you seem to be getting serious about this guy, Donald Trump, becoming our president. And I want to make sure you are thinking this through before you commit.
First let's go over the positives. He is certainly self-confident. I've frankly never met anyone more so. You may recall the other night at dinner when I asked if he'd like some salad and he not merely refused but also offered to punch me in the mouth. Now that's decisive.
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He is well off. No one seems to know precisely how much money he has, but it appears to be a lot. I mean most of the guys you date ride around on buses - he landed his helicopter in our back yard! (Remind me, btw, to go by the garden center and pick up some new shrubs. You might ask Mr. Moneybags if he'll cover the cost of that...just saying.)
And he inspires people. The other day a guy told me that your beau has motivated him to consider applying for Canadian citizenship, and he wasn't even considering it until they met.
But what do you really know about this guy of yours? He brags about never having been in a relationship like this before, and honestly I can see why that is attractive. Many of your previous suitors have let you down, even that one from a few years ago who promised he'd "change" everything. However, all the unknowns about your new fellow bring uncertainties.
Sure, your little friend Minnesota ran off with that guy, Jesse, for a while and we all remember California's fling with Arnold. But we're talking about all of you, America, and before you toss aside all of your more traditional dates, I just want you to be sure this is the serious candidate you want for your serious matters ahead.
Again, I stress that this is your decision. Our family has been great for a long time because we are all free to make our own choices. I have the greatest faith that your decision will be right or we will eventually make it right.
And you know, America, I will love you just the same.
(CNN's Tom Foreman is the author of My Year of Running Dangerously)