Do I still have to pretend not to like Miley Cyrus? Because I think actually I love her.
To clarify: Speaking as a human, she bugs. But as someone who writes about pop culture, I think she's going to send my kids to college, and I don't even have any yet. Because girlfriend does not know when to shut up.
Take this Rolling Stone interview: Not only does she mention offhandedly that Stephen Baldwin has a tattoo of Hannah Montana's initials (what?!) but she also says that her neighbors include "Diddy's baby mama" (don't call your neighbor that!) and Bob Hope's widow before she passed away ("Sometimes I'd walk by and see all these people in there dressed up like old-time flappers. I was like, 'Is this real – or are you guys all ghosts?'")
But the neighbor she apparently has the most beef with is comedian Steve Carell, who lives nearby and has young children. "He always gives me the stank-eye because I drive so fast," Miley says. "The other day I was trying to reverse and I almost hit a thousand things, and I was getting nervous because I could see him going" – she demonstrated a disappointed parental sigh. "I'm like, 'Oh, my God, Dan in Real Life is watching me right now!'"
So obviously all of this is amazing. But let's all agree that the most amazing part is that Miley refers to him not as Michael Scott or the 40-Year-Old Virgin, but as Dan in Real Life. Why is that how she knows him? What even is she? This is great.