Despite the fact that we are apparently smack dab in the middle of something that the Internet is now calling “Engagement Season” (*opens window, jumps out*) not everyone is snuggled up in the cozy embrace of true love this winter.
Alas, while every blonde-ish 20-something girl in your office is manically updating her Pinterest page with this hour’s choice of wedding invitation calligraphy (COPPERPLATE IS SO CUTE YOU GUYS IT TOTALLY SAYS “STACY AND GREG” RIGHT?) some celebs were calling it quits.
According to US Weekly, Madonna’s three-year relationship with boytoy Brahim Zaibat is donezo. I find this shocking because I thought that all 25-year-old dudes are just looking for a woman as old (older?) than their mother with arms more jacked than their father. If an almost-50-year-old lady and her just-barely-over-the-legal-drinking-age boyfriend can’t make it, who can? (Heads up, Kris Jenner — probably not you and Ben Flajnik.)
Another couple who cannot make it are Taye Diggs and soon-to-be ex-wife Idina Menzel.
This one actually made me feel a little sad (as sad as one can feel on behalf of two people one has never met and will never meet which, OK, is not so much sad as a general feeling of “well, huh”) because they seem like pretty chill, not-annoying people.
Diggs — who is perennially adorable and I’m pretty sure does not age — and Menzel met on the set of “Rent” way back in the ‘90s and have been married since 2003.
And now they’re separating. Ah well, at least we still have Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom to carry out our dreams of everlasting celebrity love.
OH WAIT. (They’re divorcing, too. Don’t care. The word “Kardashian” has a Pavlovian, vomit-inducing effect on me at this point. Not full-on vomit, just that sour taste at the back of your throat. You know what I mean.)