This might sound strange, but sometimes I wish my boyfriend was a little more jealous. OK, make that jealous, period. Maybe I’m crazy, but if your significant other never acts like a green-eyed monster you start to wonder if maybe they wouldn’t care if you took another lover on the side.
Jealousy is one of our most primal instincts and when it rears its ugly head, it’s hard to ignore. Suspicion and distrust, completely irrational or otherwise, can drive a sizable wedge between even the most compatible of couples.
But ignore the whole deadly sin thing for a second and consider the fact that jealousy, in the correct measure, might actually be a very important part of a relationship. It’s not exactly healthy, but it can be reassuring. Nothing says I’m still passionate about our romance like an emotional outburst over a mysterious text message, right?
As you might have guessed, I have, on occasion, been a little bit of a green-eyed girl. I promise I’m not one of those I’m-going-to-hack-into-your-Facebook-account-in-a-suspicious-rage types. I specialize in passive-aggressive displays such as the always popular, I’ll sit here brooding for the better part of an hour because you gave our waitress in a low-cut shirt a lingering stare routine.
Of course, all of these instances of petty pouting have a lot more to do with my own insecurities than any philandering behaviour on his part.
Being one of the most naturally confident people in the world, my significant other never feels threatened. He thinks of jealousy as a pointless exercise in time wasting. And while he’s probably right, I still find it irritating.
Recently we were out at a bar with friends and I found myself cornered by a particularly slick-talking guy while my boyfriend was in the washroom. When he returned, he didn’t approach the situation with an assertive “She’s with me, buddy” speech. Instead, he stood at a distance and laughed as I awkwardly tried to escape the flirtatious advances of Mr. Too Much Hair Gel.
How wonderful it is to find someone so trusting and good humoured, right? Yes I suppose I should be glad that I haven’t partnered up with an overly possessive caveman. But come on, is it so backwards of me to crave a little bit of protective chest-puffing once in a while?
– Read more of Jessica Napier’s columns at www.metronews.ca/shesays