After all the news of the day, if you’re in need of a little love and romance, you’re in luck and need look no further than KFC. Yes, KFC as in Kentucky Fried Chicken, but it’s more like Kentucky Fried Romance. And we ain’t talking about that universal love of KFC’s famous mashed potatoes and secret-recipe chicken.
We’re talking actual love and romance in the form of an e-book called “Tender Wings of Desire,” which the fast-food chain just released via Amazon.
This writer downloaded the book on her Kindle, which is free and one of the two reasons she did so. The second reason? KFC released a romance novel! Duh. (The things we journalists do for the sake of journalism, am I right?)
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Here’s everything you need to know about “Tender Wings of Desire.”
This one's for you, Mom
The book is dedicated to “mothers everywhere” as “a brief escape from motherhood into the arms of your fantasy colonel. Whoever he may be.”
Oh, he’s Colonel Harland Sanders, and he’s about to sweep you off your feet.
A runaway bride
Lady Madeline Parker flees her home, Parker Manor, on her horse Persephone hours before marrying her betrothed, whom she does not love. She finds herself in Mistle-Thrush-by-the-Sea, where she takes her very first job at The Admiral’s Arms tavern.
A chance meeting
At the tavern, Madeline meets American sailor Harland Sanders, who is so very dashing that “a blind person would think he’s handsome.”
The first kiss
After Harland disappears for two weeks after their initial meeting, leaving Madeline to try to make herself forget about him, she finds him waiting for her after the tavern closes one night. As the pair walks around Mistle-Thrush-by-the-Sea, they share their first kiss, which “was electric.”
Is this the next "Fisty Shades"?
While I’ll let you find out on your own if Harland and Madeline consummate their love, I will say that their said connection was described as “fire” and “flames” and “rage.”
The Colonel's secret
It isn’t until a letter urging Harland to return to Kentucky to “take up the mantle of Colonel Sanders” arrives from his brother that Madeline realizes her love has been keeping a big secret from her — and no, it’s not his recipe.
“Yes, I’m a Colonel. Yes, I’m fabulously rich. I am a magnate of the restaurant industry, my dear,” Harland says when confronted.
Will their love and passion survive Harland’s lie? You’ll have to read to find out!
But first, watch this shirtless Adonis give you a sneak peek of “Tender Wings of Desire.”
Give Mom her true heart’s desire this Mother’s Day—a family meal and a romance novel featuring Colonel Sanders. pic.twitter.com/WHJNL9kRqn— KFC (@kfc) May 4, 2017
And do yourself a solid and check out the delicious reviews that are starting to pour in on Amazon. Here’s my personal favorite:
“A book of this magnitude is EXPECTED to be printed," writes "Johnny." "Personally, I would be proud to display a hardcover version on my mantle while I feast on a breast or wing. It's just not the same experience thrusting my chicken-greased fingers across a tablet when this liquid gold can get absorbed in paper and preserve the fowl scent that augments this steamy experience.”