Here at Metro, we occasionally benefit from the goodwill of generous eateries around town. Today, Leave Rochelle Out of It (but friends can call her Rochelle’s) sent a belated parting gift for our former Going Out editor, Meredith Engel. She’s now writing about healthy things for the Daily News, but we didn’t let that stop us from accepting it on her behalf.
The dish is called the Happy Ending Meal, and there’s a lot to love in this little black box. And, of course, the “grown-up twist on [a] beloved childhood treat” comes with a toy.
Though our meals contained a slim can of Jim Beam and cola to make it portable, Rochelle’s serves it up with a shot of its whiskey of the week and a beer. Hm, maybe we should’ve gone to them instead of getting delivery.
Next is the Wimpy Burger, a hefty little portion that tastes like agourmetBig Mac (that’s a compliment). The special sauce resemblance is uncanny, though someone definitely tipped a spicy extra into the batch — not that we’re complaining. Cheese, lettuce, pickles and ketchup round out the flavor.
Though they were cold by the time we got into our boxes, the modest portion of skinny fries held their crispy outside, with just enough salt and grated Parmesan cheese to keep things interesting.
And finally, the “toy” at the bottom of the box: a condom. A meal that leaves you satisfied AND ready for more fun? Rochelle’s, you saucy minx.
The Happy Ending Meal is available every night from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. at the bar. $10
Leave Rochelle Out of It
205 Chrystie St.
The meal lived up to its name, says designer Billy Becerra: “I was having a bad day until I saw the Jim Beam and cola in a can, and then it got a little better. The burger and fries were very tasty.”
Books editor Emily Laurence likes the price: “This happy meal definitely left me happy. The spicy mustard gives the burger an edge above the array of other options in the Lower East Side. I can’t believe this whole meal is only $10!”
Kate Thomas appreciated the pick-me-up between designing pages: “That burger was soooo good. I feel like someone just slapped me awake with the valiant force of spicy ketchup and red meat.”
City reporter Anna Sanders prefers a milder experience — in some respects. “The burger was a little too spicy once you got to the center. But it’s nice they went with the expensive condom brand.”
The delay between kitchen and our desks caused some woe for social media editor Amanda Art: “Burger bun was soggy and the fries oversalted.”
Multimedia editor Lenyon Whitaker showed his budding foodie side: “Quite tasty. The spicy wasabi(?) mustard was a nice surprise. The fries were a bit cold but they were definitely enjoyable with the light sprinkle of Parmesan cheese.”
Online editor Andrea Park was, as always, ready with a bon mot: “I ate it so quickly I almost swallowed the condom.”
This meal even melted the food snob heart of our production manager, Clark Weaver: “The burger was very superlative and cooked to perfection; fries were golden and crispy, full of flavor.” If you knew him like we do, you’d rush out for a Happy Ending Meal right now.
Contact Eva Kis at firstname.lastname@example.org.