Well, well, well. It sure has been a long and winding road this season of “The Bachelorette.” This year, the series brought us its first black bachelorette, a man with a legacy of racist tweets, a creepy serial ticker and also, romance!
So who won Rachel Lindsay’s heart in the end?
It was Bryan! Yes. Bryan — the man who consumes Rachel’s face whenever they’re making out, so it looks like, as my friend says, “a dementor sucking the soul out of a beautiful and innocent muggle” — and Rachel are engaged. Please join me in a collective sigh of grave disappointment.
Of her decision, Rachel repeatedly said that she didn’t pick based on race. “You just assume that it’s a typical reality TV show, but once you’re in it, it’s real,” she said. “I can’t say that my time on the show combats that. It’s just who I was developing connections with, and I wasn’t paying attention to a race, career or an age. It was just what I was feeling with them.” Sure!
“Race didn’t play in as a factor when it came to choosing men along the way,” Lindsay continued. “In my final decision, I just went with my heart and the person I found my forever with.”
Spoilers pointed to Bryan being crowned the champion of “The Bachelorette.” In an interview with Entertainment Tonight, Astrid Loch — Rachel’s old pal from the last season of “The Bachelor” — casually mentioned some vacation plans of the engaged couple that could be more than they seem.
“They are going to Dallas to have a party there,” Loch said. “He gets to meet all of her friends and non-‘Bachelor’ people too. And then they’re going to Miami after that to have an engagement party there, too.”
Personally, I was realy hoping for Eric — so sincere! So beautiful! So real! — to win. Or even Peter, y’all! Peter is beautiful and gap toothed and legit, man. Basically, I would have accepted anyone but Bryan, who is, if I may say, kind of skeevy. Also, his relationship with his mother is straight up troublesome.
Happy engagement to them, though! From one black Rachael to another black Rachel: Girl, I guess.