It’s been a pretty brutal summer, as far as long-term matrimony goes. We’ve already seen Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner call it quits, then Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert. And there’s of course been that ever-present talk of splits between Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, plus some scuttlebutt about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie being on their last legs. And now? Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale are done after 13 years of marriage. What the hell? (Oh, and if pop-rock isn’t your scene, Reba McEntire also announced she’s getting a divorce, y’all.)
Given the shock some of these announcements have caused, I’m trying to look forward, putting the following marriages on notice. Granted, this is all completely baseless speculation, as I’ve heard nothing about any trouble in these particular unions. But still, the Stefani/Rossdale announcement came seemingly out of nowhere, so who’s to say? Here’s who I’m worried about:
John Krasinski and Emily Blunt: They seem ridiculously happy and super-nice, but if this summer has taught me anythingit’s that terrible things happen to good people.
Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson: Maybe the stress of having Chet Haze for a son will finally be too much.
David Bowie and Iman: They’ve been pretty quiet lately. Let’s speculate!
Christina Aguilera and Matt Rutler: Sure, they’re actually only still engaged, but Stefani and Shelton mean thattwo other “The Voice” judges have gone down, so Rutler should probably be worried.
Anyone else you think we should be keeping an eye on?