Dating in NYC not so different from anywhere else: Match
“We don’t stand out, which I think is sort of cool. Wherever you live in America, singles have real things they want, their wants are universal.”
We’ve surely all heard horror stories of what it’s like to be single in New York City, but here’s a newsflash: Dating in NYC really isn’t all that different from anywhere else, at least according to the latest “Singles in America” survey from Match.com.
“We don’t stand out, which I think is sort of cool,” said Dr. Helen Fisher, senior scientific advisor to Match and a New Yorker herself. “We’re a big international city, and this is showing that wherever you live in America, singles have real things they want, their wants are universal.”
In Match’s eighth annual “Singles in America,” the relationship company surveyed more than 5,000 non-member singles from ages 18 to 70-plus on everything from appropriate first-date behavior and intimacy to robot sex and, yes, politics.
New Yorkers and other American singles are on par when it comes to crossing political party lines to date. Seventy-one percent of city singletons (and 72 percent of other Americans) would date someone from the opposing party.
“This is a perfect example of where love triumphs over politics,” Fisher said. “Finding a partner is the most important thing you do with your life. This is the person you may pass your DNA onto the next generation with, who might even put you in the grave, and singles are putting that above politics and leading the wave of being more flexible about this.”
• Subscriptions = sex: Singles with HBO or Showtime accounts had 21 times more sex on average
• Date night in: 83 percent of singles said “listening to music” is their top activity when staying in with a date, followed by cooking together (81 percent) and watching a rom-com (79 percent)
• About that tech: 70 percent of females are turned off by someone who doesn’t have internet, while 65 percent find a smartwatch or Alexa a turn on
• Cleanliness is next to sexiness: 88 percent of singles find a clean bathroom and nice sheets a turn-on
• Caring matters: 84 percent said the No. 1 component for good sex is a caring partner, followed by an enthusiastic partner, a good kisser and communication
• Hold that “like:” Just 20 percent of singles think it’s appropriate to like a social media post or photo before a first date
• Flatter him: 79 percent of men think it’s OK for women to compliment them on a first date
“Would you have sex with a robot?” is one question Match asked in “Singles in America” this year, and the fact that 31 percent of men and 15 percent of women said they would wasn’t the most surprising stat to Fisher.
“What astonished me was that 39 percent of men and 56 percent of women regarded sex with a robot as cheating,” she shared. “We’ve long since feared losing our jobs to a robot — never had it occurred to me that people could also be scared of losing their partner to a robot.”
Another notable statistic for Fisher this year is the demographic seeing the most action between the sheets. It’s not young, hip and healthy twentysomethings, but, likely, their parents’ generation as women in their late 60s and men in their mid-60s are “having the most sex and most orgasms,” she said. "They’re getting better at it. They’ve had more practice and tell someone what they need and want."