I thought it had been a while since we’d had an installment of “Gene Simmons: Quote Machine,” but fear not! The Kiss front-man is back with a real doozy. He recently popped up on Fox News’ “Trending with Andrea Tantaros,” and this time he’s speaking directly to the ladies in the audience. “Life is not a straight line and I’m here to say women think differently than men. Men must work for a living. Women have the option of becoming the housewife, which is respectable and wonderful, but what happens when the man runs away?” Simmons opines. “Don’t depend on them. Why should you? They don’t depend on you for anything. The less you depend on a man for emotional and financial support, the better off you’ll be.” So let’s all stop depending on each other and start making that money, right? Sun’s out, tongues out, y’all.
In this weird new Internet age, we live in public — some more than others. Take, for instance, British pop star Robbie Williams, who kept fans and Twitter followers updated on the regular as his wife, Ayda Field, gave birth to their second child earlier this week. He even managed to get video of her water breaking. Fun times! “So it’s a quarter past 7, been here since 10 last night and I know you’re really concerned and worried and thinking about what’s going on,” Williams says in one video. “I need you to know I’m doing great.” Judging by the photos, he was the only one. But the baby, a boy, did eventually make an appearance, and all is well. “I’ve never been more in love and I’ve never been more proud of my wife,” Williams said in yet another YouTube update. “She’s absolutely astonishing.”
That feud between Katy Perry and Taylor Swift is reportedly so serious that it might cost a prominent tour director some work. Baz Halpin has handled the direction and production design for a number of tours for both Perry and Swift, but now that Perry has been tapped for the next Super Bowl Halftime Show and asked Halpin to join her, Swift is fuming, according to Radar Online. “She got word of Baz agreeing to do the show for Katy, and Taylor has flat out said she will not hire him ever again for any performance or tour if he goes ahead with his decision,” a source says. “Katy got word of Taylor’s ‘ultimatum’ and found it quite amusing.”
Kevin Smith shaved his beard. I repeat, Kevin Smith shaved his beard. He ditched the icon facial fur for a shot in his new film, “Yoga Hosers.” Now, I’m not suggesting it’s news anytime the “Clerks” director does anything hygiene-related, but the results here are pretty astounding. “Look at this goofy spaz,” Smith says in the post revealing the change. Look at him, indeed.
It is a truth generally accepted that Joel Schumacher’s 1997 “Batman and Robin” — George Clooney’s lone go-round as the Caped Crusader — is the nadir in Batman franchise’s 75-year history, and nothing has come to symbolize that low-point more than the nipples Schumacher for some reason had added to the character’s costume. But the folks at Dorkly aren’t going to let that stop them from trying to make sense of the superfluous areolas. In their new video, “Why Bat-nipples are awesome,” they argue that the additions are actually amazing and make Batman that much more threatening to the criminals of Gotham. “Instead of a bat-creature following you, it’s more like a pro-justice, sex predator demon.”
Follow Ned Ehrbar on Twitter: @nedrick